Having lived and cycled in Sydney for 6 years, I’ve grown accustomed to occasional bad attitudes towards cycling in Sydney. And that’s from someone moving here from London. This is why when riding in Sydney I go out of my way to not offend people in any way possible, just to prevent the inevitable totally over the top reaction. By not offending I mean, trying to dissolve into thin air, which I’m sure we’ll have an app for soon. Sydney siders just don’t seem to like cyclists. photo: Shannon Morris

Lycra Nazis

That is, unless they ride themselves. Then we ‘cyclists’ form huge pelotons of Lycra Nazis blocking Anzac Parade at 8.30 or blindly running their Fixie Without Lights into Oxford street while running the red lights. Thing is, I don’t identify with either side of this ‘discussion’.

It’s just a way to get around people.

I’m not a ‘cyclist’. I’m just someone who sometimes gets around on a bike, sometimes I use a car. Sometimes I walk, sometimes catch a train. Cyclists are just like real people!

Greencliff. These guys really, really don’t like bikes.

But then the Greencliff people take this nonsense to an entirely different level. Check out the sign they put on my bike when I parked it on Alexandra Drive last week:   Now it would be easy to laugh about this, because it is kinda ridiculous; obviously Greencliff agent drive their BMW’s with a stack of preprinted notices for cyclist in their booth.

But why is the note anonymous?

There’s no way for me to check what Greencliff’s policies are apart from threatening to steal/damage other people’s property. Can I call them to ask:

What is ‘this location’?

Where does ‘this location’ start and end? Who is ‘building management/security’? Or are you just making this up as you go by making a generic flyer and plastering it all over place? I would have loved to sit in at the meeting when Greencliff decided this would be a good idea.

Bloody cyclists.

I don’t like being run over, so I do my best to be as considerate as humanly possible.

• The bike was parked on a three metre wide footpath. A herd of very overweight hippos would have been able to stampede right past my bike. The logistics of getting them to Australia; another matter.
• Not obstructing anything, no wheelchair access, ramp, door or footpath anywhere near the bike.
• No signage telling us cyclists can’t park here. I wonder why? Oh wait! Is it because it’s a communal space that we all paid out taxes for?
• And of course: No bike Racks Anywhere. Unless you expect me to drive to where my bike is parked of course mr Greencliff?

So who are the Greencliff bike thieves?

I highly doubt that Greenfield has the legal mandate to damage and confiscate bikes, so I’m going to do what any self respecting social video producer would:

Let’s point a camera at this

I’m going to put a Gopro on my mate’s balcony and see if we can capture some Greenfield Cycling Hating Bolt Cutter Wielding ‘security and management’ types.       Keep you posted! Do you have any experiences like this? I’d love to hear about it!